Kids are such a delight. My four-year-old ambushed us in bed at 5.45am this morning, climbing over us to nag us awake. “Mommy, can you bring a facecloth,” she said. “My arse is stuck together.”
Oh no, I thought. “Did you do a poo?”
“Noooooooo,” she wailed in exasperation.
“But why’s your arse stuck together?”
The girls put on their hats and sunblock and went out to play
“My arz, my arzzzzzz.”
I realised she meant her eyes and she was being bothered by some sleep in her eyelashes. You got to love the Eastern Cape accent and clearly I’ve gone native now that I’m back living here, consideirng what my daughter’s picking up from me.
I once told a young American journalist slumming it in a newsroom I worked in in Cape Town to phone my buddy, swell guru Steve Pike, for some quotes on a surfing story she was doing.
“Hi, can I speak to Steve Pork,” I heard young Lara Lopez saying on the phone a moment later.
Picture courtesy of cool public domain images website of pics published prior to 1923.
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March 10th, 2009 at 2:44 pm
Hehehehe… Ja, I was worried what kind of an accent my son was going to have growing up on the East Rand. Then we moved to the Eastern Cape… “Goforrit darry! Goforrit darry! (Go for it, daddy)… sigh… can’t take the boy out of the Eastern Cape, can’t take the Eastern Cape out of the boy….
Love your site Gill! Bron and I are seriously impressed. (I’m going to have to pinch a few ideas if you don’t mind).
- Jan
March 10th, 2009 at 3:13 pm
I’d be insulted if you didn’t, Jan. It’s a free-for-all in this medium. Apparently the Eastern Cape accent comes from the influence of the German settlers in these parts. S’tru’s bob.
March 10th, 2009 at 3:41 pm
My best is when EC kids ask for “more mork in mah cereal”.
Great site.
Oh shit, now I’ve got to fill in one of those security tags which take me about an hour and a half to decipher…here goes…looks like Michael Batman…or is that Machirado Batnam..
March 10th, 2009 at 6:01 pm
I think it was michael bolton.
March 10th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
I think it said Michael Bolton. Have you seen The Office?
March 10th, 2009 at 8:47 pm
Thanks to you all for the cool comments. Really appreciated when you’re starting off alone in the online wilderness
March 10th, 2009 at 8:49 pm
The life of a lone blogger is a challenging one…. nice to hear from you all.
March 10th, 2009 at 9:13 pm
Hahaha. Cute story. The best is if you live in an Afrikaans town. In EL I speak perfect English, but the moment I hit Uitenhage I start gooiing (throwing) the Afrikaans words. Jirrre! It’s kief man.
Nothing says it better than the Afrikaans words like: moer (beat up a person), klap (hit), naar (nauseous), lus (when you really want something – as in “I’m lus for chocolate cake”), sommer (just because), deurmakaar (confused). Another thing I noticed is that when people speak they sometimes repeat an Afrikaans and English word with the same meaning in one sentence, like “I’m moeg tired hey”.
March 10th, 2009 at 9:20 pm
really neat Gill!
you had me in stiches with this story.
regards
Bazil
March 10th, 2009 at 9:44 pm
Shot Baz and here;s one for you, Nicky, I haven’t heard in a long time: “I’m so tired of blogging, I need to dos.”
March 10th, 2009 at 11:15 pm
And now for some real East Randisms:
Jirre, het jy die sparks gecheck china?
Ah’ll klap you so hard you’ll feel surrounded…
Ah’ll klap you so hard your children will be born bruised, ek se.
Ah’ll klap you so hard your grandparents will be cryin’.
Tune my, my ou, wat se wiele het jy? Gooi rubber man! And then my personal all-time favourite:
Tune me grof Ah skaaf you glad, ek se…
March 11th, 2009 at 10:45 am
Mix that “crap” with surfer speak/dirtbin (Durban) drawl, tsotsi taal and seffrican and you got a lingo from another planet:
Ayta Brah, came way this side on your stutoot with you stick. We gonna vie for a stroke in my scoroscoro. Maybe sink a few zamaleks and squeak takkie. Should be some hot spoonies on the floor…
10 points to anyone who works that one out….
March 11th, 2009 at 11:03 am
Jeez Louise, Gwava. Wtf?
March 11th, 2009 at 11:08 am
Isnotsodfcultansa2moro…
March 11th, 2009 at 11:10 am
isnotsodfcultansaonsite2moro
March 11th, 2009 at 11:18 am
what about cellphone sms speak? that’scrazyshitman
March 11th, 2009 at 11:45 am
Don’t be such an old ballie, dude!
March 11th, 2009 at 12:31 pm
LOL laura maria gonzales lopez….
where is that gal?
we used to have fun in CT…
March 11th, 2009 at 3:14 pm
Great site, gill, good luck!
March 12th, 2009 at 12:53 pm
ansa to yesterday’s Kopcrapper: Ayta Brah (Hello mate),
came way this side on your stutoot with your stick (come to my house on your motorbike with your surfboard).
We gonna vie for a stroke in my scoroscoro (we can go for a surf in my wreck of a car).
Maybe sink a few zamaleks and squeak takkie (drink a few black label beers and dance) .
Should be some hot spoonies on the floor (should be some pretty girls dancing.)
March 12th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
Silly me. I thought spoonies were a kind of wave.
March 14th, 2009 at 8:43 pm
So you can imagine my horror when I went to my first Seth Effrican braai when I arrived in the country. The girls were around the pool and the guys were around the fire which I thought a bit odd (particularly since I was keen to get laid). Then one of the guys suggested we get some \arse cream\. Bugger this, I thought, I’m out of here.
March 15th, 2009 at 4:31 pm
And pray tell, Bullard, have you learned how to braai like an egte Seff Effrican yet? When I lived in London I was invited to a barbeque by a well-meaning hack from The Times, who thought it would make my boyfriend and I feel at home. A very nice chap but the barbeque was a gas cooker in the garden on which he managed to burn all the meat. So we all just got pissed, which did indeed make us feel at home.
March 17th, 2009 at 8:10 pm
@Gill – have you seen who’s oriface?
Gotta lave these:
http://www.southafricalogue.com/travel-tips/south-african-slang-a-comprehensive-look.html
Baff
(Fart) “Sis John! Did you just baff?”
Bark the dog
(A literal description of the act of vomiting) In South Africa, you also kotch, park a tiger, blow chunks or make a technicoloured yawn.
Blotto
(Extreme inebriation) When an ou or a brah is on a rage, there is a strong chance he will get blotto. In other words, wasted or vrot to the point when reality is totally blotted out.
Bubble biters
(Blue bottle jellyfish)
March 18th, 2009 at 9:25 am
I’ve never heard “bark the dog”. That’s excellent!